However, when there are problems, you can get a little uptight. Or maybe that’s an understatement.

Frustration builds against what’s happening and your sweetheart. Then, it can quickly escalate to you being really mad and angry.

When emotions get the best of us, we cannot be our best.

Emotions can be your best friend or they can haunt you. And in relationships, especially marriage, emotions cannot lead the conversation. That takes you down a dark rabbit hole where you can’t see what’s coming.

Seriously. Think back to when someone sounded threatening to you in a tone of voice or words. Your natural reaction is to go on the defense. No one likes to be threatened in any form or fashion.

So why do we as spouses think we can do it to our sweethearts?

If you want to win more than lose, just calm down.

The K.I.S.S. ~ Just calm down!

Now that win or lose doesn’t mean that you get your way. It’s about building a life together and communicating to achieve the goals you set as a couple.

But none of that can happen if you don’t calm down. There’s no reason to throw fuel on the fire.

So how do you just calm down? It all takes some T.L.C.!

1. Take a deep breath. Breathing gives your mind and body space to pause. You can gather yourself and look at the situation differently. And you most certainly can take three long breaths before jumping in.
2. Lower the intensity. You can’t communicate well if you are over-heated. Have you ever felt your heart when you are so mad? It can feel like it’s exploding out of your chest. You can’t figure out life in this situation.
3. Care for the heart. See the person’s heart so you don’t let your own emotions get carried away.

Conflict and challenges are never fun regardless of the circumstances. But if you take a moment and just calm down, you can change the outcome to be beneficial from all sides. This is a way you stay clear of being emotionally triggered.

But let’s be honest. You will have a blowout or two; very intense heated discussions. But you can always mend the fences with a little T.L.C.! Which means, you get to just calm down.

“Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!“