When rules are brought into the marriage, there seems to be an underlying lack of trust.

In marriage, you must trust your partner. Now remember, trust is earned. And if you are keeping score, where can you find that trust?

It’s more than challenging. Because when you factor in the demands, you have control issues also.

Marriage is built upon an understanding that you both are in it together. It’s not about equal responsibility. It’s about respect for each other in their strengths.

Think about it. Would you want your husband cooking dinner if he burns food all the time? Probably not a great source for healthy living. So why put the blame on him when you think you’ve done enough of the cooking, that it’s time for him to do his share. I betcha he does his share in other areas.

If you want a marriage where you are connected and the intimacy level is high, you must love without demands.

The K.I.S.S. ~ Love without demands!

You could try to control your way to happiness. It might work for a single individual. But one who is married has two different people in the equation.

So how do you love without demands?

1. Love unconditionally. If you are placing demands on your spouse, how is that love? You are determining how he/she should participate in his/her life. It’s a two-way street in a marriage. See your spouse for who he/she is. Don’t let what he/she does determine how much love he/she deserves.
2. Remove the conditions. There is not ONE way to do anything. Plus, marriage is a TWO-way street. So instead of assuming and controlling your spouse’s actions, work with him/her to compromise or find a solution that works for a two-way marriage.
3. Find the commonalities and celebrate the differences. Your spouse might do something much better than you or be stronger in a certain area. Don’t let that get under your skin. Celebrate his/her strength. Let him/her do what he/she is good at. And then when you are good at something else, then let your strength shine.

Life is about working together, not against each other. When you love without demands, you increase the intimacy in your marriage. And no, not just sexual intimacy.

Love without demands opens the doors for each of you to walk in your strengths, grow in your weaknesses, and hold up the other when he/she stumbles.

Marriage is a beautiful gift. Don’t mistreat your spouse because you think you’re better. You both need each other to be better.

Stretch each other and love without demands.

“Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!“